riaerif

I've been doing well with everything in Al Anon, but today I actually moved forward in another way.

My mom has been in my life constantly as has her addiction. I tried to move out at one point and that failed thanks to the current economic climate so I've been back here with her for a few years, as have my two children and husband.

I graduated college and I have a job and things are going okay. We're still here, though, and she's relying on us to keep her in her home and her car.

She's going to trial tomorrow to change her plea to guilty for theft of drugs and hopefully she won't go to jail. Or maybe hopefully she will. I'm not at all sure how I feel about that.

Anyway, today I applied for two jobs that are eight hours away. If I leave she will most likely lose her house and her car. She could easily live with my grandmother, though, so it's not like I'm leaving her to be homeless or anything.

But this house is my home, too. Letting go of my past to embrace the future should be a no brainer, but it hurts. I want everyone to be happy and okay and I'm wondering how I can feel good if she doesn't. And does it really matter? She never seemed to care how I felt when she was making herself happy.

Anyhow, thanks for listening.

Ria