Me, too.
My son is also an opiate addict. He was 23 yesterday. I, like all other Moms, find it so difficult to escape from the worry and pain and the fear. My son is still his addict self, I am in counseling and it is helping. I have to find a way to escape the anxiety. I have to find a way to feel confident I have done all I can, and I think I am finally there. I pray I stay there.
It has been over three months since my son's children were taken from him and his girlfriend and they have made no real progress to have them returned. They have both relapsed after two months of hard work. I realize that if losing your children isn't incentive enough there is certainly nothing I can do.
My son starts Suboxone on Monday and REAL counseling. I say real because a lot of the counseling is pretty anemic. It is all a waste of time if he doesn't want it. The addict will get out of it what they put into it.
In the meantime, my grandkids, now 4 months old and 3 yrs are WONDERFUL. They may exhaust us but they also make us incredibly happy.
I understand your pain.