Thank you so much guys - lots of good info here. I guess it would make things so much easier if he had a job and was contributing $$ to this household. He's given me about $400 during the last THREE months. That's it. I've been responsible for every single bill here. As it stands now I have to come up with $1700 a MONTH for Cobra. I have to continue this because DS will most likely need eye surgery in another 2 months. If I change anything his surgery would be deemed a pre-existing condition. I guess the purpose of my calls is to guage his usage AND stay on top of him about getting a job. He's sinking us day by day every day that he doesn't work. The insurance alone is what is killing us.
As of now he basically just lays in at his moms watching tv. He'll make a few phone calls RE; unemployment, seeking employment or to lawyers to try to get his job back. I feel like if I don't stay on top of him about everything than I'm shooting myself in the foot too kwim? I feel like I'm protecting us AND him by the calls I guess. I cannot afford to keep paying $1700 a month for Cobra. Not for very long anyway.
To be honest, it IS an addiction for me. We've ALWAYS talked multiple times a day. In reality if I look back on it it was/is a control thing on my part. I just am realizing that. Making sure he was where he was suppose to be at whatever time he's suppose to be there. Making sure he remembered this appt or whatever. Man - if I could just turn that energy inward. KWIM?
On a positive note, I just got back from the lake. I took the kids with my family and we went skiing, tubing and swimming. So I was glad to get away with them today and just chill. Seems I'm always working or doing or going. You know what? Through this, my kids are awesome, they are doing great. I'm so proud of them - they are great 7 year olds.