I have been "away" from life for so long. I'm sure the tools used to handle the roller coaster will need to be relearned. Turning to drink was an all-in-one cure for me. It solved every celebration, every awkward moment, every ill emotion. I wonder if I will remain in my now peaceful state. What challenges are ahead, will blood fill my face with anger, will I slam things around to let people know how I feel, will I still be verbally abusive to the people I care most about? (I often did this because I knew they'd forgive me) I know I will have to develop, seemingly, new tools to handle life. To prepare myself I will find a new way to vent, a routine or hobby that keeps me at the lowest end of the spectrum. I thank these posts for giving me a heads up. Prayers