By the way, my ex used to do the same things your husband is doing - and worse actually.
Once I stopped trying to figure out why he treated me that way and started to ask why I accepted it, things got better. I started to draw real boundaries about the kind of treatment I was willing to accept in my life and I started to enforce those boundaries.
He stopped. Well he stopped treating me like a door-mat. Actually, he didn't stop trying, but I stopped letting him. A person can only treat us like doormat if we allow it.
I'm much happier now.