Live and Let Live?
I let a sponsee go this morning.
I realize that I am not her marriage counsellor, therapist, financial advisor, etc, but could no longer look the other way:
She is in a Big Book study with me and didn't go to our first meeting because of previous plans. No problem. This week she says she doesn't want to commit because she wants to get a job. I had already dropped her homework off at her house this morning when I couldn't reach her. It turns out that she met a guy in a restaurant yesterday and went home with him. She wants to stay the night again. I'm not sure if she is drinking.
Upon reflection, I see that she has only gone to those meetings where I gave her a ride. She lives 5 minutes from me and has no vehicle or licence. She hasn't gone to a meeting for about 10 days now.
I had formed a friendship with this girl and really enjoyed spending time together. It felt good to see her sharing at meetings, connecting with others, and expressing gratitude for a sober life.
But .. I am judging her. Guilty as charged. I don't like the way she is conducting herself, while knowing it is none of my business.
Pushing that stuff aside though, when it comes down to recovery, I'm not willing to work harder than my sponsee. I'll do whatever I can to help another alcoholic, but not if they aren't willing to pull their weight.
Am I being too hard on her?