Silverberry1331

Okay...this one is new on me....need some suggestions.

Brief background: This counselor is the person who was seeing both me and the AH for marriage counseling. She is aware of my husband's addictions. She is aware of my co-dependence. She stated after a few sessions that she felt that our marriage was over. I have continued to see her because my therapist of 16 years has moved out of state. This counselor says I am an "over-giver." Not arguing that.

Now the scoop: last night in session, I told her that the AH was moving out. I told her that he had called his father (also an A) and asked if he could come live with him. His dad said no. My husband was really upset about it. She asked if my husband had talked to his father about working up there (his dad owns a business), instead of living there. I said no, but told her that I was annoyed that his father wouldn't help him out after his father helped his other brother who also has addiction issues. Then...she suggests that I try calling and speaking to my father in law! I was really shocked....I mean...isn't that rescuing and enabling?! I told her that my f-i-l is also an A and I don't have that kind of relationship with him to speak to him about it, and she says that maybe I can email him!!!! Not to mention, when I told her about my husband not packing yet, she told me that I should help him pack and help him move boxes to his new location. This doesn't seem as strange, since it gets him out of the house and gives him a reality check....but still..

Am I missing something here? My gut says something is not right, and I know that I should go with my gut...HOWEVER, my gut has also been wrong in the past because of codie thinking...things that my gut said to do in the past have been enabling or not healthy on my part, so I am unsure. Where is the line between kindness/helpfulness and inappropriate behavior?

Thoughts please!!!! Thanks all!