Abs - I normally wouldn't say this but I feel like I "know" you. You need Anvil in your face. Sorry to be blunt - you may be mad, but am saying this in your OWN best interest. You are falling back into his grips and I don't want that for you girl. Take the time to step back FOR YOURSELF. That doesn't mean you have to abandon him, but just that you have to protect yourself and stay on YOUR path. If he can catch up, fine. If not - it's his loss. Just callin' it like I'd want it pointed out to me. Hopefully you understand that I'm sayin' this for your own benefit.