(((Abundance)))
I think you are doing pretty darn good! I know you don't FEEL like it, but you are focusing on what YOU want, and limiting contact.
I hope you can keep staying away from him. If he really wants to do everything he can to get your family back together, he will. You've already told him what you will accept.
As far as why he didn't listen to you when you TOLD him what would happen? Honestly, haven't you set boundaries before that you didn't keep? I know I did.
We addicts will go to any extreme to keep using AND keep our enablers enabling. We'll tell you what you want to hear, we may even straighten up for a little while. It takes TIME, to prove (by our actions) that we are in recovery. I had months clean, working at recovery, but my family STILL worried if I was late coming home from work, or they didn't know where I was. I consistently called them when I was late, I paid my bills, and let them know where I was. I'm almost 47 years old, WAY too old to be held accountable, but I don't mind. I robbed them of their peace of mind for 2 years. It's the least I can do, and it's just common courtesy.
Stay strong and stay away from him. Let him SHOW you he wants to work at recovery.
Hugs and prayers!
Amy