My sponsor is a good guy, I love him and he does his best, I'm just a mess. I just can't seem to forgive myself. Maybe I'm just not ready. I'm ready to quit drinking and I have for 7 months. Maybe, the chickens are just coming home to roost. My life has sucked since I quit drinking. I don't want to start over, I want to fix the past. When I realize I can't...I lose it. I just need to deal.