Sweetie, Anvil is right. It takes longer than 3 weeks.
You are grieving...losing him, losing your dreams for a future with him. Even though my XABF was still just as happy as could be, out there using, I still grieved for him. But I was addicted to him, just as I was addicted to crack.
I read, on a thread, today something about God can't give us a new life when we're desperately holding onto the old one. I'm almost 47, and am wondering if I will ever find the "right" man. But, I'm learning to be comfortable with ME before I even look, because I have a radar for finding the WRONG man. Put me in a room with 999 "good" men, one "bad guy" and I will be instantly attracted to the "bad guy".
Take your time and do what Anvil suggested...start a gratitude list. When it was first recommended to me, I was angry and didn't think I had much to be grateful for. Once I started, though, I realized there was SO much I had to be grateful for.
Give yourself a break. You're human, and this hurts, but it will pass.
Sending you BIG hugs and prayers!
Amy