Hi
Welcome, to start with, his problems are just that, his problems. In order for you to move forward in a healthy relationship, IMHO you need to cut those ties.
Part of the alcoholic personality that I have learned about is they always make those that care about them feel quilty when we try to move on without them or do something for ourselves. You didn't deserve the abuse, you don't deserve the quilt, and you definately did NOT create his alcoholism. He did all those things to you and himself.
What is the worst that could happen to YOU if you cut those ties? Take him out of the equation for right now, What do you want? What do you deserve? What does you future hold?
I think maybe counciling and Al-anon might be helpful to you. Try turning this over to a HP and let it go. Concentrate on you getting healthy and happy.
There is nothing you can do to fix him, he has to do that for himself. All we can do is work on ourselves and let them take care of themselves. If he ends up alone that is his issue and not yours.
God Bless you and good luck,
Barb