My defining moment was the occasion of my first blackout. I woke up one morning and was confused to find my knees and legs covered in mud and mud all in the bed. I had NO recollection how I got in that shape. I sat there for a while just going through everything and coming up blank. Finally a very very vague sort of a ghost of a memory of me falling out of back of our trailer started coming into me but I wasn't sure so I asked my kids. They confirmed it. In our trailer if you turned right you went into the bathroom and if you turned left and unlocked the back door then you fell out the door onto the ground because there were no steps. Obviously I turned left and fell out.
That was an eyeopener to be sure but it was still a long time and many more blackouts, bad behaviors, calling off of work, trips to multiple liquor stores to avoid looking like an alcoholic, hiding, driving home on my lunch hour to have something to stop the shakes, driving to a liquor store on my lunch hour to stop the shakes, driving my kids to school drunk, drink in the face of major organ shutdown and many many other stupid things before I was low enough to actually do something about the drinking.
Good thread, thank you for starting it!
Kellye