WOW...
Welcome to Sober Recovery!!
I hear ya. I was raised by 2 addicts and have 3 siblings and a husband who are all addicts. I have also had my bout with drugs and alcohol. I did decide over 20 years ago to get clean.
I have been lied to so many times that it is very difficult to discern what truth actually is. I do have some clues as when I am being lied to though 'cause if I actually believe it I start feeling crazy...needless to say I have gone to the very edge in my own sanity many times.
I hope that being here will help you feel not so alone in dealing with your family.
In all the years of dealing with addicted loved ones I have found that the only thing that helps me is to keep the focus on myself and keep my hands, thoughts, words and actions off of trying to solve their problems.