****{NICI}}} Been there, done that - married a 'sober' guy who had 12 years 'sobriety' but was so full of anger, it was worse than living with a drunk. At least with a drunk you can see the reason for his behaviour, but with someone who was heavily into AA service with 13 years behind him, it was a complete nightmare.
He also used to get very angry if he thought I had shared about my marriage problems in AA meetings, or even with my sponsor!!! Because his reputation was at stake. Of course in AA meetings, and when carrying out his AA service duties, he looked and acted like the epitomy of sobriety, but this disappeared as soon as he walked into our home!!
I know we can all go through a dry drunk now and again, but a continuous five years is a bit much, really. And as Mr Nici posted, we are supposed to look also for the good points, and I TRIED!! really I Tried - AND I DID see SOME good points, but not nearly enough to encourage me to stay with him.
We divorced after five years of complete hell,and thank God and the support of AA I sayed sober.
GABE - [I also think that respecting someone's internet privacy is very important in a healthy relationship] I AGREE, to me it is like someone opening your mail when it comes through the door!!!