Hey there Barb, I have found the worst thing I can do to myself is project and worry...It is without any benefit at all and sure does make my heart and spirit sick. I'm sorry you are stuck in this role...I understand the fear, but is this really how you want to spend each day?
He had is second dui...is it your job to fix that? There are things like buses, light rail, feet and bicycles. I just hate thinking that you are committing yourself to acting as jailer for 2 years because of the consequences of his actions. Guess it strikes a cord because I remember spending quite a few months acting as taxi the last time my daughter lost her license too. It was my problem...simply because I let her make it my problem. Actually, that isn't fair to say at all. It was my problem because I chose to make it my problem!! Did it do anything? Heck no...she kept doing what she would do, because she had that soft landing. I didn't know better then, but I learned better the next time. She's been clean and sober for quite some time now, but she still doesn't have a license. So she sought housing near the light rail; she sought a job near public transportation and posted to join a car pool. She went back to school via a grant to a state university and online classes. The best part of it is seeing how proud she is that she has done this on her own...to see her gaining back self confidence and using the tools she is acquiring to handle whatever bumps there are on her journey.
I still sometimes bite my tongue or hold myself back to make sure I don't rescue...It's a hard habit to break and having lost a child, I sometimes can be overprotective of her. But I realize that my way wasn't healthy for either of us. This way is and I am grateful for everyoine here and in the rooms who help me stay the path. Hugs