Hi there welcome! So glad you have taken a step to help yourself. Glad your fiancee has too. One of the most difficult things I found early on was realizing I couldn't fix all the pain and hurt my loved ones were experiencing as they battled the addiction demon. That's hard...I thought that was part of being a mom; being the great fixer. My own recovery has helped me realize that I need to step back and allow them the room to grow.
I have found on particularly trying days that suggesting a diversion was helpful - a funny movie, a walk, a nice dinner. If it was accepted, great. If not, I had to try to not hover and accept that they had to find their way through it however they could.
Please keep reading and posting - there's tons of support here. I also found Naranon groups (or Alanon if there is no Naranon in your area) to be wonderful. The face to face support from others who have been where I was is terrific.