Anubus let me say WELCOME to SR. You have found a great place with experience, strength, and hope (ES&H) from many individuals here.
Anubus, hmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm, are you an SG-1 fan??? lol That was the name of one of the worst of the Gaould. lol
Now, with many years of recovery from alcoholism under my belt (over 27) I have to say YOU ARE ENABLING THIS MAN. He has found a nice nest, and is going to CONTINUE to manipulate you to the ends of the earth. As far as his having no place to go, there are shelters and the Salvation Army, which by the way has an excellent program for recovery.
However, there is something even more important going on here. You are HARBORING A FUGITIVE, and if the police care to they can charge you also! I know it will be hard, however, for your own peace of mind, you really need to turn him in.
Everyone before me is correct. A few days or 90 days in jail (which will be in a county jail)will do him so much good. It will be a 'wake-up' call. Will give him some health care, and he will have no choice but to be sober.
You CAN NOT HELP HIM. You are HINDERING him in finding his 'bottom.' I was 33 1/2 years old when my family said NO MORE. When I came to the door it was shut in my face, and when I called on the phone (long before caller ID, lol) they hung up on me. It took me another 2 1/2 years to find my bottom and the last 1 1/2 years I lived on the streets of Hollyweird. IT WAS THE BEST THING MY FAMILY EVER DID FOR ME.
On my 3 year anniversary in AA, my AA sponsor STRONGLY SUGGESTED, that I start attending Alanon IMMEDIATELY (I was married by then to another sober alkie) and so I went (kicking and screaming, but I went, that day). IT WAS THE BEST THING I COULD HAVE EVER DONE FOR MYSELF.
I strongly suggest that you find some Alanon meetings, in your area, IMMEDIATELY and start attending.
You may love this man, but to be honest..................................you are killing him with your love. I am sorry but You cannot HELP him. He has to find recovery on his own. All you are doing is making it easy for him to NOT FIND RECOVERY.
It is now time for YOU to start taking care of YOU. That includes NOT letting him drive YOUR CAR or the car the Minister has offered. This man has NO LICENSE, drives drunk, and is leaving you wide open for a s**t house of LAWSUITS.
Time to take care of YOU. Run to an Alanon meeting and attend at least 6 before making up your mind about the program. Talk to the folks there, either before or after the meeting. Face to face help is an incredible 'reinforcer' to help us work on us instead of them.
I don't mean to sound harsh, but I have been on both sides, over 27 years in recovery from alcoholism and over 24 in recovery from codieism and I speak the truth. Ask others here, they will tell you.
Love and hugs,