It might help to clarify your thinking by borrowing a technique used in communication classes. Try making a list of items in the following format: When my A does/says X__, it makes me feel Y__, and I want to do Z__ in response. For example, is it really the fact that alcohol is in the house that bothers you? Or is it more specific: "When my A is intoxicated, I feel Y__." Or even more specific: "When my A is drunk and yells at me, it disrupts me by Y__." Once you have a list, you can review it and decide what you would feel comfortable doing in response to the A's behaviors. For example: "When A is drunk and disruptive, I will ask for it to stop and for us to calmly discuss it later when sober. If the A refuses, I will stay the night elsewhere so I can rest for tomorrow's stressful work day." Think it through carefully, and pick behaviors for yourself that you feel will help you, and that you feel confident you can do in that situation. Remember, it is always OK to feel safe and change your situation if you don't, and you deserve to care for yourself first. You can't effectively help another if you are not well to begin with. Keep posting and let us know how we can help.