I tend to agree Daddio. Most of us "cowardly addicts" aren't abusing anyone but ourselves, really. And the men and women on this site are courageous enough to face down a deadly disease, alcoholism and drug addiction and recover from it. So no, I don't think we're cowards.
And I'm sorry, but I don't agree with dating someone who is still married and living in the marital home, especially where children are involved. I'd advise you to tell her not to call you until she is a free woman, has at least filed for divorce and moved out with her children. Even then, you should take your time to give the children a chance to acclimate to the situation before you try to create "instant family" or you'll see the "lovely lad" in all his mommy-protective splendor the first time you have a little spat.
kj