I've actually been thinking about seeing a counselor. Have an Emlpoyee program through my work that will pay for a couple of sessions - going to look into it.
Question for NoelleR - Why is it out of line for me to ask him these questions? I honestly don't understand. I guess maybe my perception of marriage is wrong, but I thought when you were marreid to somebody, you shared everything. Maybe I have a problem here. I just don't see what's wrong with me asking him why he needs to go every day. If there's something going on in his life, shouldn't I, as his wife, be worthy of knowing?
I actually think that's part of the reason why he won't communicate with me. No need to since he shares all he has to in his meetings. I guess, in a way, I feel as if the bond between us has been replaced with the bond with his AA buddies. If that's the case, I'm definitely out of here. I don't want to be in a superficial relationship where I'm only privy to that which he deigns to share. To me, a spouse should be a soulmate and best friend in addition to a bed partner and a roommate. Maybe my idea of marriage is wrong, but that's how I feel inside. I guess I feel that it's just not fair since the rules changed in the middle. When we started out 28 years ago, we both wanted that type of a marriage - now he doesn't want to share anything with me and I feel cheated. I know - life isn't fair, but ......
I'm sure I'm wrong somehow - somebody set me straight. And - I'm not mad at anything anybody says here - I'm definitely trying to learn and appreciate everybody's input.