Hi ex~~~I started counciling when my son came out about his cocaine problem. I had no clue that I was codependant. Just thought I was being a good mom..OMG~~~did I cry at first. I bet there's some help for you at Social Services in your area. Thats where I tried first and spent months there. Now I'm into therapy for myself. I have found it so helpful. I'm sorry you picked the same type of man but at least you have now realized and can help yourself. Good luck and smiles, Bonnie