How do you get through your anger?
I went to an Alanon meeting yesterday because I didn’t know what else to do with myself. I have not started to attend regularly but weekends are the worst. I am usually ready to pop a nut on Mondays no matter how busy I keep myself or how far away I get me and the kids, from him and the insanity over the weekend. I am so full or anger and resentment. I don’t give a rat’s you know what about what happens to him or what he thinks, does, says….zip. I hate him hate him hate him.
So I go into this meeting, and everyone seemed so serene (sp?). There’s no anger, no hostility, no blame. I felt like the Tasmanian Devil in a china shop. The fact that they were all so calm annoyed me even more. Then I read some literature.. it only made it worse. “Just for today I will be agreeable. I will look as well as I can, dress becomingly, keep my voice low, be courteous, criticize not one bit. I won’t find fault with anything, nor try to improve or regulate anybody but myself” ahhhhhhh, I wanted to run from there screaming. I went in looking for people like me who don’t care if their AH ever gets sober. I went looking for a place to scream out loud about how mad I am…. I vacillate between depressed and angry and yesterday I was angry dag nabit!
Where do you all go with your anger? What do you do with it?