Last year when my daughters addiction had come to a really bad point, I went through the typical not sleeping not hearing from her for days and never seeing her. And when I did see her she looked like death.
My "best" friend for 43 years was the last person on this earth I thought would vaporize.
I had been there for her all our lives, through thick and thin.
It was so hard to have that freindship vanish at the same time I was facing my daughters mortality.
But like us mothers I put that on the back burner and got busy with helping my daughter.
When I finally looked up last summer and no contact from her,(my daughter had hurt her daughters feelings in 2000) I realized that she is a weak person and the freindship was largly based in me "being" there for her.
The one of only 2 times in my life I relaly needed her she was not available and in fact made it a point to bring up a 7 year old issue that made her "upset".
What I realized at that point was that she was not a true friend, but leaned on me the co-dependant all our lives.
She only likes lovely stories about her kids and told me that I was too open with mine.
In retrospect it was for the best that we part ways, but it was like a death after all the years of "friendship".
It has however made me go back and reevaluate all the relationships in my life and weed out all the sick ones.
I have done lots of reading about my co-depedent issues and most of all this board has let me see that it's okay to turn the page, move on and take care of myself.
What is funny to me now is that the truth about her as a freind was in front of my face all along, just didnt want to see it I guess.
The hurt goes away one day at a time.
We deserve better friends....