Callie,
He's an adult.
He's responsible.
It sounds harsh, yes. But, the man who started this forum, Jon, is dual diagnosed too. He gave me good advice about my son, which I didn't listen to -- my son was *different*; was *younger*; started younger....you name any difference you can name and I named it! It doesn't matter! The fact of the matter is this:
If he wants to get clean and sober, he has to be willing to do whatever it takes.
It's that simple.
And *we* need to stop making every excuse in the book for them.
That is that simple too...
I'm sorry.
I wish it was easier. It's not.
But, then again, it's as easy as "Let go and let G*D."
Get to your nearest naranon/alanon meeting, and learn.
There's plenty of people who are willing to share their ESH, (experience, strength and hope), with you.
Please continue to let us know how it's going. We care...
Shalom!