I'm not much of a follower LOL I did the 'don't drink' 12 step programme..(well 10 'don't drinks', one 'help others' and one 'be a good Dee - where possible')
it seems to work for me - which is the main thing, right?
Don't let arguments and bickering sway you steamvessel - we all know when somethings right or it's not.
my advice is to shut up and listen to your instincts - trust the inner compass.
Failing that, listen to those you trust, I guess
D