OMG Teggie! Our stories are so similar! I am struggling so much right now with how to handle my AH soma addiction. He, too, has legitmate back pain, which got him into a hydrocodone/Lortab addiction 6 yrs ago. He's been on suboxone for 3 yrs, weening down to almost nothing at this point, but he's never completely stopped taking the muscle relaxer Soma. So I know all about the face sliding off his skull thing. I;m going to post a new message in a moment if you care to read and see how it may relate to your situation as well.
Anyway, I don't have any advice per se as I'm in the same boat as you with only half an oar. I only wanted to offer my support and let you know you're not alone.
Good luck to you!