Nowwhat~ your post really hot home for me. I have been with AH for 10 years now. It has finally sunk in that he has put his insecurities off on me all this time. I just never knew how to get out of it. I too should have said no when I meant no. When I do say yes but he knows I really don't want to he complains because I am hateful about it. He has done things to me that have made me become that way. He also refuses to do anything about him being unhappy. He thinks he doesnt need it. I have felt emotionally void for so long. Now that I have realized that I need to leave the marriage I feel like my old self is comming back.