Lightseeker-
I didn't mean to imply that's what you were saying. I'm sorry about that.
For me I think it's just really important to be clear as to what the rules of the game are depending on who's playing. The rules become more complicated and the playing field messier when there are kids involved. Kids get far more stressed out and confused seeing Mommy or Daddy stressed out and confused and it does effect them in the long run.
Parents tend to see their kids as smarter and more intuitive than other's kids, but they won't know for sure how all of this drama will effect their kid until it's too late and the damage has been done. And who really wants to test their kids in this way?
So, all I meant to do is just add a "sub rule" to your post. That's all
