Originally Posted by
mallowcup 
They want you to like them better when they are drunk. They want you to compare their sober behavior with their drunken behavior and prefer them to be drunk. Oh, and it had to be your friend or it wouldn't have been nearly as effective.
That strikes me as very possibly true. In fact, I ignored a lot of signs, because I was in denial and just couldn't believe something like that was going on, but ultimately it was so glaring that I had to take action. It was like she wanted to get caught. And when I returned to the house after confronting my friend, believing naively that there had been some innapropriate flirting and phone calls that pissed me off of course but was not going to be the end of our relationship, she had left and begun a three day bender in a hotel. That is how she returned to drinking one week before her year mark of abstinance.
It is so crazy, and I have had this experience more than once now that all is out in the open and her drinking isn't a big secret I feel I have to keep from family and friends, it is so crazy when people point out ways I have been manipulated that I never saw before. I just find it so hard to believe that this woman I loved, who was sweet and wonderful when not overly drunk, was scheming and manipulating me consciously. Is this something alcoholics do unconsciously, or was I completely wrong about the person she really was, if she didn't have all the alcohol-related problems???