Welcome LostGuy...glad you are here.
I have been married to an alcoholic for 14 years (been together 19), and have finally realized my enabling and co-dependancy has done nothing good for myself or our relationship.
I am no longer in the business of accepting unacceptable behavior...from anyone, especially my ah.
I've been attending al-anon mtgs., seeing a therapist and reading/posting here on SR since February...I have made so much progress in my recovery.
My ah says he does not like the person I am anymore (b/c I'm working on my "issues", maybe?). Thinks I'm weird (b/c I will no longer enable him).
He has "cut back" on his drinking. I've always thought that if he would stop the drinking that things would just "magically" fall into place. Not true. There's lots of work to be done (emotionally...through counseling) for both of us.
The thing is....I've discovered I don't really like him whether he's sober or drunk. I just don't like this man. He is a man of little integrity....with or without the alcohol.....so sad....
I feel for you...this is a tough thing to deal with. Take care of yourself!
Shivaya