Hiya bragi!!
You've found a good place to get info/insight/advice here at SR!!
I guess that since you are realizing now that your Mom was/is an alcoholic - maybe that is unique - but I think what you will find as you read more about alcoholic families is that you have a lot in common with other children of A's. Alcoholism is the disease of denial and it sounds like your folks were really GOOD at refining that aspect of the disease.
You said you always knew/still know your mom is "different" at night. She is unreliable, she rages? So you actually knew something was "off" or wrong, but you were a kid for most of those years and you didn't attach the name alcoholism to it. Maybe you didn't want to know...maybe the dynamic in your family made it unacceptable for you to even THINK that was the truth.
Regardless, you are out of denial now!! You are hopefully getting in touch with reality - a good place to be that alcoholic parents can really skew for their children.
Keep reading - the more you learn the more you will be able to unravel what was really going on for you back then...and now. Sounds like your mom is still actively drinking - unfortunately alcoholism is a progressive disease and tends to worsen over time.
I'm sure you're going through a painful time with this. It must be a bit of a shock. Keep posting- keep reading - there are many here with lots of experience in every aspect of alcoholism/addiction and loved ones.
Peace,
B.