I am so sorry, Eddison. It's such a hard situation (as anyone here can tell you.) The feeling when you find something like that, it's like someone hit you over the head, kicked you in the stomach. I threw up when I found stuff the first time. I panicked. I walked around the house trying to tell myself what to do. I never felt so alone and so angry and upset.
I agree with what people here are saying--you can't make him stop. I think at this point you have to make some decisions about yourself and your child. Think of yourself. You have permission to do that and you CAN leave him and go somewhere else. He's an adult and even though he's an addict, he CAN take care of himself if you make that choice.
I would have thrown the stuff out, especially if there's a child in the house. You don't want that child finding it and the worst happening. Or, I'd take the child and go somewhere else.
But, again, you have to make these decisions yourself. I just hope you know that you can always come here for a hug or to talk. That's what I do and these folks are wonderful.
:ghug
And maybe I'm missing it in the stickies, but I'm curious what the "general consensus" is on how to proceed when you find something. Everyone is different. I put everything I found in a box and set it on the kitchen table with a nasty note, then left. I've also confronted him (in calm ways AND not so calm ways.)
But, I would think there are guidelines for telling them, "look, I found this s**t and this is not ok with me." I know you can't make an addict stop and there are posts about just accepting it and finding a way to live with it, but does that mean you don't explain to them that you are not alright with the situation? Sorry, I'm just confused here. Maybe the answer could help the original poster as well.
Again, I know we all must choose what to do, but I seem to be missing that part.