Hi DenMac,
Welcome! You are in the right place.
I am certainly sorry to hear the pain and suffering youre experiencing. I know it well. To answer your questions of what should you do....my answer is, and you may not understand or like it is.........................
TAKE CARE OF Y-O-U!
Your mental health
your spiritual health
your physical health
your emotional health
She is an alcoholic. That means she is suffering from a physical, mental and spiritual disease. A true disease. There is no cure. You didnt cause it, no one did or does, and most importantly you cannot control it. What does this mean? It means there is nothing, and I repeat NOTHING that you can do to keep her from drinking,,,,and any consequences that come with it,,such as falling down, drunk driving, harming herself or another harming her. Its just that simple.
You cannot, and more importatntly SHOULD not prevent those harmful events from tocuhing her. That would be called ENABLING her disease. When we try to prevent the natural consequences from hurting the A, we are preventing them from faceing thier alcoholism. She must be held accountable for her choice to drink, only in that way will she become, hopefully, aware of her illness.
What you can do, it what you must do, in order to survive this hellish disease. Sounds like you made a start already in detachment, by physically leaving an unacceptable situation. Now, you need to learn how to take care of you in the way I mentiones above. First, get to an al anon meeting. Fast! You will meet/hear of people who have been in your exact shoes,,,yes, exact. You will hear how theyve learned to cope with things and find happiness, yes happiness, whether the A is drinking or not.
Alanon has saved my life, in more ways than I can count.
In the meantime you have all the love and support of people here on this forum, and we welcome you to come and vent, dump, cry, laugh,,whatever,,,!
This too shall pass,,,,,,and better things are to come,,,I promise!