Hi and welcome,
You are NOT overreacting. What you are describing is classic alcoholic behavior. I especially related to your point that he wants you to drink along with him; this is a tactic often used by alcoholics to ease their own guilt over their problem and to allow them to continue in their denial of their disease (I experienced this for years from the alcoholic in my life, my sister). His body is addicted even if he cannot admit to that fact; that's why he's drinking things he "wouldn't normally drink"--he's addicted and his body is craving it. Furthermore addicts will almost always replace one addiction with another: he was a smoker and when he gave that up, he became a drinker. I'm sorry if this sounds harsh--I don't mean it to sound that way. But from my own experiences he sounds like he is fully dependent on alcohol.
Have you considered Al-Anon? It might give you some perspective. In the meantime keep posting! Everyone here can relate to what you're going through.
Hugs