yes lost it does....................I've been where you are and in some ways I still am.............
my husband is in treatment, hes a crack addict ( nasty thought huh? ) a professional loving man who is an addict, and I still love him and despite the horror of my family and friends I still have hope that he will be able to get his addiction under arrest and we can have that life together............but addiction is a FOREVER thing. For the rest of his life .............and your husbands too.
they dont go to treatment and come back good as new. Sometimes they get worse...........
The main thing for YOU right now is to REALLY look at yourself, and start asking yourself the WHY questions
why do I want him in my life
why do I feel the way I do...................
Please dont take this wrong, but I have found that theres alot of issues that are MINE, and that only by working on me can I expect to ever have a decent life with him if and when he is able to maintain sobirity
Have you read codependant no more yet? If not PLEASE do. And if the first time you read it you think well thats not me....................read it again......
our lives are forever changed by addiction................at first it seems like the end of the world..............but with alot of work on your part on yourself you may find that you come out not only better but stronger too!! ((((((HUGS)))))))