I'm so sorry that he hurt you in this way...Addiction turns our loved ones into people we don't know, but once they find recovery, we can find the loved one beneath the mask of active use.
My daughter used heroin and crack. Both are horrible of course but I actually got to a point where I thought, please if she has to use, let her go with an opiate. Crack turned a very sensitive, loving caring girl into a mean and ruthless monster. I understand how hurt you must feel.