Codependent checklist-could this be you?
Look over the list and check those things that describe you. Be open and honest enough to allow reflection on your patterns of reacting to life. Most of us have some codependent behavior guiding our responses to life.
1.Think and feel responsible for other people.
2.Feel compelled - almost forced - to help others solve problems, offering advice, suggestions, etc.
3.Anticipate other's needs, even before they ask; wonder why others don't do the same in return.
4.Say yes when I mean no, doing things I really don't want to be doing.
5.Doing more than my fair share of work & doing things other people can do for themselves.
6.Try to please others before seeking to please myself.
7.Feel safest when giving to others and insecure and guilty when others give to me.
8.Feel sad because I spend my whole life giving to others and nobody gives to me.
9.Feel attracted to needy people and attracted to them in dependent ways.
10.Get bored and feel empty when there is not a crisis or a problem to solve or someone to help.
11.Overcommit myself and feel controlled by events and people.
12.Believe deep inside other people are somehow responsible for me.
13.Try to control events & people through helplessness, guilt, coercion, advice, manipulation, etc.
14.Pretend circumstances aren't as bad as they are; "things will be better tomorrow."
15.Stay busy so I don't have to think about things.
16.Get confused, depressed or sick to stop doing things.
17.Become a workaholic.
18.Sometimes think God has abandoned me.
19.Don't feel happy, content or peaceful with myself.
20.Desperately seek love and approval.
21.Equate love with pain and stay in relationships that don't work.
22.Find it difficult to have fun and be spontaneous.
23.Say everything is my fault yet believe nothing is my fault.
24.Spend money compulsively or overeat, abuse drugs or alcohol.
25.Lie to cover up and protect people I love and lie to protect myself.
26.Don't trust myself, my feelings, my decisions or other people.
27.Ask people for what I want and need indirectly - sighing, for example or subtly suggesting.
28.Afraid of my own anger and frightened of other people's anger.
29.Have sex when I would rather be held, nurtured and loved or when I am angry.
30.Extremely responsible, a good martyr, sacrificing my own happiness for others.
31.Don't say what I mean and don't mean what I say. Don't even know what I mean.
32.Can become withdrawn and isolated - afraid of being hurt by others.
33.Give appearance of being depended upon, but are very dependent on others for approval.
The first step toward change is Awareness ; the second step is Acceptance !