Hi there, welcome! I'm glad you are reading around here and keeping up with the post. Yeah, I found that knowing there are others who get how I feel somehow made it just a little bit less sucky. I felt leary of meetings to begin with too, but I did end up finding a group that provided me with so much support. Even now, two years later without addiction directly in my life, I go because I've made such wonderful close friendships and it helps me in every aspect of my life. Whether you choose face to face meetings or not, I think you have already taken the first step of a support network by coming here.
There is a saying in the anon groups to the effect of when you don't know what to do, do nothing. It doesn't mean stick your head in the sand or live in denial; rather take your time, weigh your choices and if it doesn't feel right yet, it is really okay to do nothing. I've always been one who wanted to be the fixer and to fix it right away. I never realized the stress I put on myself and how it clouded my life until I learned to take the words seriously. Giving myself the luxury of waiting to act, but not obsessing about my choices in between, has really helped me in my own recovery from the effects of addiction in my life. So I think your decision to not decide yet and to take time in choosing how you will respond to what you have learned is a wise one.
I'm sorry you are going through this. My teen years were tainted by alcoholism in a parent and I really didn't know there were ways I could help myself. Everyone around me kept it a dirty little secret, so that's all I knew as "normal." It's only now after dealing with another addiction in my life, that I am learning a better way. What I've learned has helped me let go of that past too.