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Old 03-17-2008, 03:49 PM
  # 2 (permalink)  
Miss Pink
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Nov 2007
Location: Right here somewhere
Posts: 509
seems you may have a misunderstanding of what boundaries are..

They are self governing rules for one's inner peace and protection.

They are not threats to make another do what we want...or else.

A boundary is a self determined choice I make to keep myself from harm. When I make a boundary, I place it upon myself not others.

Example:
I choose to not be in the presence in person or via phone with a person under the influence of alcohol.

Now, that doesnt mean the person who drinks must be sober around me. I may ask them to respect my new self imposed rule, however, I will not expect them to respect that. That rarely do. So, that means if they choose not to respect me, and come into my presence drunk, I leave.

I am the one with the boudnary, I am the one required to enforce it.

Boundaries dont make people shape up, they make ME shape up to perserve the self respect I have developed.
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