No contact is hard. In time it's easier. Keep reading your old posts and read those posted by others and you will be reminded of the reason why you need no contact.
I went through exactly what you are going through...many times. Going through it just little right now as my xabf was fired recently from our mutual place of employment. And though I know its the best thing there are times when I miss him. I used to look forward to seeing him there even after our relationship degraded to the point where I too changed my number and proclaimed i hated him. A place in my heart still cares for him. And I gieve myself permission to feel this way. I just thank God that he's no longer in my life everyday to pull at my heartstrings and manipulate me.