I was going to copy and paste some of the things that jumped out at me in the reading above, but it was too much. I can see myself and my past in almost ALL of it!
I was such a martyr for a long time. I did everything humanly possible to hold the family together. I was the ROCK...while our life was twirling out of control. I made excuses, I took blame that wasn't mine to take. I also took credit for things that weren't mine either. I stretched myself so thin it's no wonder I felt like I might break at any moment!
Thank GOD for the program of Al Anon. It helped me untangle my life from his. I was finally able to see what was mine to take care of , and what wasn't mine at all. My happiness was no longer tied to his moods / behavior. I was able to see my part in much of the drama, and I learned about boundaries, choices, consequences.
It's really an amazing thing : when one person works on his/her recovery, the dynamics of the entire family start to change.
Hugs
Cats