Christina,
Your answer lies, I think, in your question. It will get better and the fact that you asked the question proves it.
You seem to have a really great grasp of what is going on. Just not quite sure of how to turn that graps into something useful? Sorry, I don't know that either.
But, knowing what's wrong - I believe that's the biggest part of the battle. As long as you know what you are looking for, I am sure you will eventually find it.