Hi Mrs. Fox,
I'm so sorry that you are going through such turmoil with your mother. How wonderful that you do have a daughter of your own to love and cherish. A book I found very helpful in explaining why someone else's drinking was making me crazy and sad is called "Codependent No More" by Melody Beattie. It helps explain how your mother's drinking has affected you in your life a little.
I was also so grateful to find this website. And just look at how many members there are! Isn't it nice to know that you are not alone in this world and that others will be here every day to support you in your desire to stop the insanity that is in your life? There truly are better ways to live with an alcoholic in your life. I hope you read as much as you can about how adult children are affected by their A parents and realize that your life can change for the better. It truly is possible.