Thanks again, Lily. And you know what, I really have been beating myself up over my "relapse" in my codependency, and I think I am done with doing that now. Still no word from Chris, but I heard he's hanging out with some of his friends (who are drinkers and druggies), which is really no surprise. I messed up, I did, and I can only grow from that, I can't take it back. I guess another hard part for me is blaming myself for him taking off like that. He probably wouldn't have done that if I hadn't had the reaction that I did, but on the other hand, he could have went to his mom's to stay, and been a little more responsible. I don't know, here I go focusing all on him again. All I did was give him an excuse at that moment, in his eyes, to go on a 3 day binge. But if I hadn't done that, he would have eventually done it anyway, so either way....both of us need to own up to our own behaviors.