I am reluctant to bring my little problem to the board but here goes anyway - because I need an outlet. My RAH is not active in any recovery program. Weve been married almost two years. I will say that he can behave like a selfish
pr$%k sometimes and can criticize, argue and push to get his way. My tendancy has been to keep the peace and try to accomodate him. I get to feeling so angry and resentful and that I really dont like him (despise is the word). That I wish he would go away and not be in my life! But now I am working on my reocvery thru alanon and am learning to set my boundaries and respond to him
differently. But now when I do apply these new ways and am successful at holding my ground I see his ego deflate somewhat, like he realizes I am not going to give in this time, and he may be seeing what he's been doing. And now the problem is I feel SO SORRY for him! Like I want to swoop him up and give him back the control he was so used to having over me! Is that sick or what? I hate the feeling of resentment toward him and I hate feeling sorry for him. Why cant we simply be equals with give and take and mutual respect instead of this constant battle? thanks for listening.