Thanks, Lily, and to all for responding. I did read your other post and it was helpful. I don't know what will happen now, more than likely my "punishment" for "kicking him out" will be he will disappear for several days, then call and give the act that he is done with me, it's a game, and we both play it.
I guess when he calls (and he will call), I will just apologize for the way I acted, own up to why I acted that way. None of which will matter much to him anyway, he will see it as a betrayal, and will take my apology as a way to control me anyway. It would be nice for him to respond to my apology by saying, "you know what, I haven't earned your trust and will try harder on that also", but he won't. I've come to know not to expect anything like that as I will only get let down.