From my experience and stories I've read on this board, it's quite common for the A to react negatively when changes start happening. When you stop doing the dance with them the way it has always been done, it creates fear. It's likely that he knows the drinking will be addressed and HE DOESN'T WANT THAT. He is attempting to emotionally manipulate you into going back to the same old dance. Don't do it. I don't know if the appointment you made was for couples counseling or individual, but I would strongly suggest seeing a counselor one on one. It can help you sort through your own feelings and reactions without his interference.
JMHO,
L