Originally Posted by
nandm 
My oldest daughter felt like I had abandoned her too. She did not speak to me for a year. It took a lot of work to earn her trust again.
Here are some of the things that I did that helped, you might find some worth trying:
* stayed sober
* Always told her I love her
* Made a CD of songs that reminded me of her and sent it to her. There were songs that reflected her beauty, some that reflected her pain, some that were an apology, just a variety of what I felt best expressed the words I was unable to say.
* Never gave up
* wrote my feelings out in a non-judgemental way and sent them to her
* Again never gave up
* continued to reach out despite the pain of being pushed away
I wish you the best and do hope that she will find peace.
Oh thankyou... I always tell her I love her and she does the same. I am the sober person and have a couple on weekends.
I wont give up but she is so bad, Im not sure how long we will have her.
She never pushes me away, (we were always so close and she is afraid of loosing me)
I have done all the judging, yelling and listening. Way too impatient now. I listen on the phone but can only take so much now. (same old stuff she goes over and over) It seems she just cant get back to reality, she just cant see that life can be good to her if she tries. Its the same for all, life is no bunch of roses but it can be a beautiful posie hey!! Its what you make of it I guess, but she has lost the ability totally to see outside her window.
Sometimes I read what others have endured with their loved ones and I relate so much. My eldest son has been on drugs for many years too and it seems I have had enough. He is on the road to getting better (can only hope) and is more aware than she of what he is capable of. I am happy that he is doing a Social worker course this year to become a 'Youth worker' and I am praying this works out for him. He is already on the way to getting his car licence, so he is trying.
I wish you all the best.