I imagine familly and friends find a lot of solidarity among one another.
Yes, there is solidarity and that is comforting but then I reached a point where I knew that my reason for being on "F & F" was for ME. I couldn't change the A in my life. The only person I had control over was myself. If I had been happy and content in my relationship with my A, I wouldn't have sought the understanding and insight of a recovery board like SR.
And I want to address something you said, Leogirl, in your original post about your "judgmental mom". I am a mother of two young adults. They ask me for advice and sometimes I give them my own opinions about their lives....that's what mothers (and fathers) do. We have something called experience and that gives us a slight edge on insight into what might or might not be best for those we love. Your mother probably wonders WHY, with everything you have in your favour, you want to saddle yourself with a person who might not ever be able to give you everything you deserve in life. And you know what's interesting in my own situation with my own very elderly mother? I downplayed XABF's addiction probably so she wouldn't start in on me about how I could do better. I think when we start throwing around the "judgmental" word we are getting defensive about our own actions or lack of actions. JMO! I hope that you and your mother are at a point where you agree to disagree for now.
ARL